Excuse the cheesy line, but this life is all you've got. Don't throw it away.
My parents were murdered just under 10 years ago. I have spent the last decade fighting depression, PTSD, and a society that doesn't know how to deal with extreme emotional effects. I feel like I'm finally getting out of that hole. It has taken a long time.
Your recent anxiety sounds like the late effects of PTSD, or some other trauma related condition. I would highly recommend speaking to a professional (actually, speak to as many as it takes to find one you like). You aren't alone, and your condition isn't unique. There will be good advice out there.
As to people being happier when you're around, That's usually a good "life" metric to check, but in times of personal crisis, you want to think about you. Who are you happiest around? Can you talk to them about your feelings? If not, can you spend more time with them?
Life is sometimes hard, and "sometimes" can last a long time, but there will be good bits, then better bits, then eventually, the majority will hopefully be good.
My parents were murdered just under 10 years ago. I have spent the last decade fighting depression, PTSD, and a society that doesn't know how to deal with extreme emotional effects. I feel like I'm finally getting out of that hole. It has taken a long time.
Your recent anxiety sounds like the late effects of PTSD, or some other trauma related condition. I would highly recommend speaking to a professional (actually, speak to as many as it takes to find one you like). You aren't alone, and your condition isn't unique. There will be good advice out there.
As to people being happier when you're around, That's usually a good "life" metric to check, but in times of personal crisis, you want to think about you. Who are you happiest around? Can you talk to them about your feelings? If not, can you spend more time with them?
Life is sometimes hard, and "sometimes" can last a long time, but there will be good bits, then better bits, then eventually, the majority will hopefully be good.