Anaconda foundation does really great marketing, outreach, advocacy, education...it's a good first place for data scientists to land. But actually installing and using Conda is always annoying. I wind up doing everything with pip and venv, because pip jsut works.
On the topic of Conda and Jupyter, install jupyter via a virtualenv pip installation, and then to use a specific conda kernel, load your conda environment in another shell, and install IRkernel in that environment. As long as you install to the main Jupyer prefix, jupyter should see the new conda kernel.
You can do this for as many kernels/conda envs as you need
Ju(lia)-pyt(hon)-eR
To make it clear