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> One of my favorite products is “100% Fat-Free Pickled Cucumbers Fit (Gluten Free), “ which I once saw at the grocery store.

On my first fligh to the US, in the 90's, a rather obese lady in the row in front of me asked the flight attendant: "Excuse me. Do you have fat-free water?"

The flight attendant hesitated a split second, her face not moving an inch. Then she smiled and replied: "We certainly have fat-free water, madam. I fetch you a bottle straight away."



A few years ago in a hotel in London I had complementary water bottles on the night stand. The label said "Organic Water from Scotland". I was like: uhh organic water from Scotland is probably cattle piss. I prefer inorganic, non-bio water.


Alex, I'll take Things that never happened, for $500.


> in the 90's, a rather obese lady

I suppose you wrote the 90's lest our mental image was of a 2020's rather obese lady? The woman probably would be skinny today




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