I defiantly learned over the years that my approach might have lead to more of these issues. Applying logic to each instance as resulted in the opposite effect and opened new doors in terms of what dirty versus clean is.
My spouse has a tendency to push back against things they might be told. For example, if somebody told them they were gaining weight, they would eat more.
Being somebody who struggles with a hot temper, I've learned that nobody really likes to be told that something is wrong with the way they are behaving. Especially if it's an issue that feels uncontrollable. The hostility purely manifests in pushback and stubbornness; which, of course, leads to heated arguments. I like to call it the "Because I said so" attitude.
In my opinion, the biggest justification is actually correct in it's baseline, which makes it so hard to break out of this cycle. Germs are everywhere and they can cause some real nasty issues. The disconnect comes in the thought pattern that they can eliminate the spread of germs. Of course you should clean things and be careful with raw chicken, diapers, feces, shoes in the house, etc.
That last one isn't like the others! You could almost certainly safely lick the bottom of your shoes (assuming you hadn't just literally stepped in shit).
When you mention the hostility, what kind of things were said? How does your spouse justify their behaviour?
It sounds like there are attributes both of OCD and OCPD, and that makes for a very tough combination.