You can use this https://chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/facesnoop/kebmejpc... to disable Facebook's "Seen" function if you want

FD: I made it

That's cool, but plugging an IM service isn't the solution. People need to learn that communication (even using so-called IM services) isn't instant.

That and that they don't have a reasonable expectation to be the single most important contact of the person they're currently talking to.

Both would help. Wire might or might not be a good service, but is really unrelated here.

Also typing notification is annoying. You can turn it of in XMPP.